Curious Humans
by Lola Witherbottoms
Summary: While in the Underdark with Jarlaxle, Artemis Entreri is forced to come to terms with a feeling he has all but forgotten. Slightly OOC, mild slash.


Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Rewritten as of 1/13/2009.

* * *

Artemis Entreri stepped tentatively into Jarlaxle's office, his dark eyes gazing at the mercenary with a fair amount of contempt. The bald drow was rapidly moving a large quill across a sheaf of paper, likely sketching out runes for spells. His large purple hat hung nearby on a hook, the massive _diatryma_ feather missing. The assassin realized that it was currently in use as the quill.

Entreri took another step closer to the mercenary, keeping his hands close to his sword and dagger. He knew he likely wouldn't need them, but they offered him a scant feeling of protection. That, and Jarlaxle seemed to warrant death threats on a daily basis.

"Lovely to see you, Artemis," Jarlaxle said at last, not looking up from his work. "To what do I owe this honor?"

The assassin gripped his sword, the sarcastic, joking tone in the mercenary's voice already getting to him. He reminded himself not to lose his temper. That would get him no closer to his goal.

"What did you want to see me about? The drow looked up when the human didn't answer, and tucked the feather back into the brim of his hat.

"I want you to get me out of this city," Entreri stated bluntly, figuring it best to be upfront. "Return me to the surface."

Jarlaxle reached for his eyepatch and pulled it off, the expression on his angular face unreadable. Then he burst into almost-hysterical laughter, clutching his stomach when it became too much.

"Ah, Artemis," he finally sighed, wiping his eyes. "I didn't realize you had such a sense of humor!"

"Because I don't," came the dark reply, Entreri's voice full of simmering malice.

Jarlaxle grinned, shaking his head. "Now, why exactly should I allow you to return to the surface? I mean, any specific reasons, or…?"

Entreri blinked. He hadn't expected Jarlaxle to comply with his demands, but he hadn't expected to be taken seriously, either. "I can kill you," he finally said hesitantly, reaching for his sword.

"I can assure you, it would take a very long to accomplish such a task," the mercenary said calmly. "You would be an old man by the time you got past my wards, and would lack the strength to even lift your sword." He raised one thin, white eyebrow. "So why should I return you to the surface?"

"I'm human," Entreri replied after a long moment. "I can't survive down here much longer."

"On the contrary," Jarlaxle countered. "You are not the first human to take up residence in Menzoberranzan."

Entreri rolled his eyes. "You have strange food to which I'm not accustomed. What if I get sick?"

"I think you'll find rothé meat is as good as anything you'll find on the World Above."

Entreri paused. "Surely you have diseases foreign to surface dwellers?"

"We have only the finest medication."

"I have no home."

"You had no home on the surface."

"I mean nothing here."

"You are a human in a drow city."

"What if I desire companionship?"

"There must be _some_ female in the city willing to have you."

"But you won't allow me to leave Bregan D'aerthe headquarters."

Jarlaxle winked. "Precautions, my friend."

Entreri scowled. "Don't call me that." He knew he had lost. He turned to leave, but was stopped when the heavy adamantite door swung shut and locked of its own accord. He whirled around and glared at Jarlaxle, who gave him an irritating grin in return.

"You want to leave because the drow remind you of yourself."

Entreri hated to admit that Jarlaxle was right, but he would never tell him that.

The mercenary's grin widened in reply to the assassin's silence. "And yet you hate Drizzt Do'Urden because you see in him all that you could have been."

"You know that's a lie," Entreri hissed.

"Is it?" Jarlaxle stood and sauntered over to the assassin. His grin had been replaced by a quiet smile, not quite reaching his eyes. He sat down on the desk and said softly, "Truth be told, Artemis, I find humans rather curious. They live for less than a century, yet they are more productive than many of the longer-lived races. They know their time is limited, but they use it to their advantage and accomplish so much more."

"So is that all I am?" Entreri snapped. "An experiment? Some wizard's rat to be studied?"

"No, no, not at all," Jarlaxle said, dismissively waving his hand. "I simply find humans fascinating. You in particular, Artemis." He moved close to Entreri—too close for the assassin's comfort. He sensed a change in Jarlaxle's demeanor, and it made him uneasy. "You have been a killer for most of your life. You can use your body as a weapon. You are ruthless and cruel. You have built a shield around yourself to protect you from the cold, hard world, but surely…surely you are capable of _some_ feeling."

The assassin tried to move away but found himself pressed against the door.

"I find humans alluring, Artemis." Jarlaxle came even closer—so close that Entreri could feel the drow's warm breath on his face. "Again, you in particular." A moment later he was pulled into a rough embrace, the mercenary's lips crushed against his.

Entreri was frozen to the spot, forced to give in to the kiss. His lips parted when he felt Jarlaxle's probing tongue. A hand came around to cup the back of his head while an arm slid around his waist, bringing him even closer. Unaware of his actions, the assassin wrapped his arms around the dark elf's slender shoulders, a fog settling in his brain.

But then his lungs began to burn, and the dull pain restored his senses. With a disgusted shout he tore himself away, thrusting Jarlaxle back. Red eyes gazed innocently at him as he wiped the back of his hand across his mouth.

"You fool!" he shouted, livid. "Why in the Nine Hells did you do that?"

Jarlaxle smirked. "To prove a point."

The assassin glowered. "You have nothing to prove."

"Living in Menzoberranzan, even for a few tendays, has made you feel things you haven't felt for years. You're lonely. You have no fellow humans for company. You were among them on the surface, but down here you are only now beginning to realize that you are truly alone for the first time in your life. You desire companionship. And as much as you hate to admit it, you need to come to terms with it. I am the closest thing you have to a friend right now, and I can give you the companionship you so desperately crave."

Entreri gaped in disbelief. "You think I want _your_ company? You think I want _anyone's_ company?"

Jarlaxle gave him a knowing look.

Entreri, too outraged to say any more, turned on his heel and stalked out of the office. He made his way back to the small apartments he had been given and sat on the edge of his bed, fuming.

But as the anger subsided, he began to realize that Jarlaxle was right. He _was_ lonely. He had forgotten what that felt like, because the last time he had felt it he had been only a boy, seven years old, when his parents had been killed.

For the first time in his life, Artemis Entreri was truly alone. And it wasn't for lack of a human presence, but because he was trapped in a city populated by creatures exactly like him—ruthless, efficient killers who cared nothing for anybody. He did long for companionship, but not what Jarlaxle was offering. Never that.

But he couldn't escape. Any journey to the surface would take tendays, and in all likelihood he would be killed in the Underdark before he ever saw sunlight. For now, he was at Jarlaxle's mercy, completely helpless. It certainly wasn't a position he wanted to be in, but there wasn't much he could do. He could only wait.


End file.
